Force vs Allow

I recently started practicing my music and singing again.  

For about a decade of my life, I practiced singing and music for at least an hour every day.  For a decade before that, I practiced piano, too.  Getting back into a more formal practice around music making has felt like coming home in many ways for me.  There are moments where it has felt like riding a bike - and then other times where I realize that the bike. is. rusty.  That's OK too, I decided.  It's through careful and deliberate, consistent practice that I know my body will get back into the familiar ease of music making again. 

As I practice again formally, I find myself just singing more throughout the day as well.  In between meetings, or as I'm getting ready for the day, I will notice myself humming a song or fully singing out loud and really being in that moment, enjoying the journey that the music takes us on.  It's been really wonderful to reconnect with myself this way and Remind myself of this huge and important part of who I am.

I am listening to music a bit more closely, now, too - like I used to.  I'm going to live performances more as well and really feel so grateful to be here and able to participate in art this way.  

Interestingly, as I've been consuming this art, listening to it and practicing my own again, I am Reminded that there is a way of mastering sound production that is based on a solid foundation of technique.  Of course there is.  But it's easy to forget.  

When warming up the other day, I was acutely aware that the way I was producing sound was from a simple, solid foundation of support, like I've learned through years of study.  What this foundation allows me to do is create a safe space for the sound to be free.  Juxtaposed with so much of the contemporary music out there, in which the sound is curated and tense and contrived, this simple and beautiful way of producing sound really made me feel as though I was allowing it to happen, as opposed to forcing it.  This felt especially true as I was practicing cadenzas.  It's the difference between building a solid foundation and allowing the sound to move on that; and never laying down that ground work - simply placing and forcing sound around a tight space.  

Of course, because music has always taught me most of the important lessons in my life so far, I drew the connection between this approach to sound production and the way in which I approach my life.

Am I building a solid foundation, trusting it and then letting go to make art from that place?  OR am I hurried and cutting corners and trying to make things happen with force?  

Here's what I know from singing: The approach that is healthier, more reliable and more durable is the one that incorporates deep, intricate, personal knowing and a mastery of craft built on top of that.  So that's where I'll be focusing my energy, as I spend time in a room with just me and piano.